Who Doesn't Like a Pedicure?
by Talkative Monkey
Summary: YEAH, really sucky summary, What will happen when Superman dares Dick, Superboy, and Wally to do whatever Artemis tells them to do? Okay, so they aren't like themselves in this, Artemis is more emotional, Dick is a lot cooler, and superboy is... superboy.
1. Chapter 1

**Blah, just another Dick Grayson story. I was really bored so I decided to make this. If I get any reviews, that would be awesome. (Literally, I will scream my head off if I get one) Anyway, I am not trying to be disrespectful to any of the characters. Especially Robin. I really love to make fun of superboy though. He really annoys me. Any who, enjoy!**

Dick and Wally and Artemis were hanging out one day. It was extremely weird for Wally, not only had Dick and him been dared by Superman (SUPERMAN!) to hang out with Artemis and do whatever she said, but Superboy was supposed to come too. Wally knew he was going to ditch them, he told her he was going to run to the store and pick up some _stuff._ Dick was just as excited as Wally, don't get him wrong, he likes talking to Artemis... but she wanted to paint their toenails. _That _was a little over the top for him. But a deal is a deal, and at least they were his toenails, not fingernails.

"So, you have any crushes Artemis?" asked Dick. Just a little conversation could go a long way. It was horrible when they first got there, Artemis (ARTEMIS!) was sobbing her eyes out. _It __would __be __a lot __freakier __if __it __was __Batman._ Thought Dick.

"Well, there is a kid named Derek-" Artemis said before she was suddenly interrupted. She felt very comfortable with these two. She would normally feel really insecure talking about her feelings with _boys_. But right now, she felt more insecure about her acne problem.

"Wait, Derek Cupper? He has the biggest feet I've ever seen! Plus, he pulls his pants all the way down when he uses the urinal!" Dick said, flipping off the bed and pretended to use a urinal. "I don't mean to be rude, but..." Dick said this like he had this conversation a million times, but didn't mind talking about it. Wally was impressed, Dick was a pro at this. Wally was the one who had a crush on her!

"Ew, you're right," Artemis stated. She always allowed herself to be wrong in front of Dick. "Do you know how to do a french braid?" She asked him.

"Oh, yeah. They're really easy. Hey Wally, how's you're school?" Dick asked. Artemis immediately smiled and clapped her hands.

"Well..." Wally said as Superboy walked into her bedroom. Dick finished the braid and held out his hand for the bag. Superboy gave the bag to Dick then sat down.

"Okay, I got green, hot pink, and black. I also got the clear kind if anyone wants to use-" Superboy said before being interrupted by Dick.

"I call clear!" He almost screamed.

"I call green." Said Artemis.

"I call black?" Questioned Superboy.

"Well, I guess you get pink then Wally. I always knew it was your favorite color so I decided to not go with it." Said Dick. And after he said that, both him and Artemis were rolling on the floor laughing. Wally sat there, he was Wally, he couldn't loose a dare!

Everyone but Wally talked as they painted their toenails, wether they were making fun of their mentors to crushes to toys. Artemis talked about her acne and why her mask covered almost her whole face. She wore that because of acne.

"But, acne shouldn't control your life Art. When I had acne problems-promise not to make fun of me- but I would put tooth paste on my face and sit for twenty minutes til it dried. It actually worked. Not joking!" Wally said. Artemis had finished her nails and was blow drying them with a hair dryer. She took him seriously, for probably... the first time ever.

"I might just try that Wally, I might." Artemis said. She touched one of her toenails gently to make sure it was dry. She set down the hair dryer and looked around her. Everyone finished painting their toenails. "Hot pink looks good on you, Wally." Artemis said, Dick had to pinch himself to keep from laughing because the nail polish got all over Wally's toes.

"Than-" Wally couldn't finish because Artemis' mom burst through the door holding a plate of pine apples.

" _There __once __was __a __barnacle __under __the __sea! __Spongebob __Square__pants!__He __was __really __yellow __and __liked __horses! __SPONGEBOB __SQUAREPANTS!_ And he really loved pine apples!" (She was singing that)She set down the tray and said before walking out, "NO kissing my daughter without my permission, okay boys?"

"Yes, ma'am!" Everyone (but Artemis) said as they saluted her. Then they ate some pine apple.

"Who wants to play a game?" Artemis asked.

TO BE CONTINUED (if you review!)

**Did you guys like it? I'm not sure if I did. Please review, I really love reviews although I'm pretty sure you know that. And let me know if you want another chapter and if I should add some other characters. REVIEW, PLEASE, FOR ME!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey everyone that is reading this. I want to thank _RobinIsAwesome_ for being my first commenter. I don't own anything, blah, blah, blah. Oh and I made my oc get involved in this story. I was thinking of writing a story about her and Robin. Sorry if the characters are too ooc. Let me know if I should! Again, Read and Review. Any who, on with the story...**

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><p>"Um, well... what type of game?" Robin asked. He didn't want it to get too personal.<p>

"Truth or Dare!" Artemis screamed. Connor flinched because the screamed words were harsh on his sensitive ears. Dick was sure the whole city of Gotham could hear her.

" Okay, Wally! truth or dare?" Wally mentally slapped himself and did a happy dance in his mind.

Slowly, he closed his eyes and whispered, "dare." He opened his eyes to find Arty grinning like a psychotic freak. _What did I just do? _ He thought.

"I dare you to go up to my mom and ask her out, using your _best_ flirt." Artemis was getting up and opening the door. "If she reaches behind her, _run._ And when I say run, I mean run for your life."

He gets up, sorting through all his of flirts. _Wow, this is gonna be hard. All my flirts are awesome._ He looks out the door and sees Artemis' mom sitting in her wheelchair, watching Oprah. _Must be a re-run. She stopped making that show._

Wally walks out the door figuring out his best flirt. "Hey, there..." he says, not knowing what to call her.

". Can I help you?" she asks looking up at him.

"If I could... Re- re-rearrange the alphabe-t-t-t I-I-I w-w-would p-p-p-put -y-y-you a-a-and I-I t-t-together." He realizes right after he says it how bad it sounds. _Ouch, you looked like crap Walls! _

"If I could rearrange I would put f and u together!" She raises her voice slightly.

"I'm sorry! It was a dare!" he pleads. His hands cover his face and he hears everyone in Artemis' room cracking up. Wally opens one eye, not wanting to make angrier.

"I don't care. I know you were serious," she says with a _hmf_ and goes back to watching Oprah. He runs to Arty's room and sits down on her bed.

"THAT... was the most embarrassing event out of my whole life," he states, putting his head in his hands.

"Okay, Connor, choose someone," Artemis said. She did feel kind of bad for Wally. Just a _little _bit.

" I choose Rob-" He was cut off when I'll Try (awesome song by the way. Check it out.) by Jesse McCartney started playing on Dick's phone.

"Just a sec," he picks up his phone and says hello. "Hay, Zabrina. Sup'?" He listens to Zabrina talking for a few seconds and says "let me ask. Is it okay if Zabrina comes over?" he asks. Artemis nods her head and claps her hands. _She's watching Zabrina too much. _He thinks. "Yup. Ow, why did you scream into the phone?" Dick questions. He wasn't sure why she was so excited. She knew this was a dare. "Okay, bye." And he snaps his phone shut.

"Who's Zabrina?" Wally asked. He honestly didn't know.

"You nincompoop! Zabrina Evelina Crint? Ring a bell?" Dick asked. Now he was upset who could forget her?

"Oh, _her! _I remember her. Hehehehahahahahaha!" Wally said. All of a sudden there is a knock at the door.

"Zabrina's in the HOUSE!" She screamed.

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><p><strong>Oh,no! What's gonna happen? Not very happy with this chapter. Sorry if characters are too ooc. I'm trying to focus on my own character. And a question I really need ananswer to...: Is there a hero named Oasis? 'Cause I was thinking that that could be Zabrina's hero name. If you have any questions about her just ask! I should be doing a story about her soon. If you guys have any ideas for this story just comment or pm me. By the way, Zabrina means Legendary Character. I don't know what language though. Please Review!<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey, I'm so happy right now. And very hyper. So, I'm gonna write another chapter. Sorry about the shortness. On with the story...**

"Please, stop yelling!" Superboy yelled. He covered his ears and closed his eyes. He just wanted to leave and punch the living lights out of Superman. That sick little-

"You're such a hypocrite Paul. Man, I know teenagers are supposed to have mood swings but you're over the top! Can't you ever be happy? And you're not even a real person. So that's a little strange..." Zabrina said. She sat next to Dick and said, "We're playing truth or dare, right?"

"Yup, you can pick someone." Arty said. She looked around, knowing that after the move Zabrina made, Zabrina would pick Superboy.

"Superboy," She said while smiling devilishly. Superboy instantly paled, he was going to choose dare because horrible things would come out of truth. He took in a deep breath.

"I choose dare," he said. She sat there for a minute or two, trying to figure out the worst dare. She leans over.

"I dare you to smack Wally's butt and wink when he's not going to expect it. And you have to smack it _hard." _She leaned back and smiled. He'd have to do it. It was a dare. And a dare is a dare to a dare.

"Fine," He says with a _humpf_. And crosses his arms. She leans over to him.

"This is your chance George!" She whispers. She's been calling her the names of the Beatles lately. He looked over to Wally. Butt out in the open, not even noticing him. He brings his hand back and closes his eyes. At a super fast speed he slaps his hand hard across Wally's butt. _SMACK! CRACK!_

)-_

**OH NO! yeah, not happy with this chapter. My idea plane is falling, and I need ideas. So review and give me more ideas!**


	4. Chapter 4

It happened in a matter of seconds. From Wally feeling someone slap his butt, then his head getting slammed into the wall, and then his entire world fading to darkness.

"DUDE! My mom's gonna kill me for that hole!" Artemis screamed. She leapt at Connor and started punching him as hard as she could. She stopped and looked at Wally. For some reason she started laughing like crazy. Then, she abruptly stopped.

"I guess people call him the Wall man for a reason. Originally I thought it was because he had a job at Walmart. But, noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo..." Dick said. Then everyone started to crack up.

Then, Zabrina screamed. "Look at George's butt!" Everyone looked and saw Wally's pants halfway down, and a big red handmark right across his butt-cheeks. Artemis ran into her bathroom and brought out a towel. She threw it right over Wally's butt and sighed.

"Good God, that was scarier than a dream I had." She then leaned closer to Connor. "Did you enjoy it? I think you did. You should've seen your face when you slapped those breadsticks. Hahahahahahahaha! I'm never gonna let you live this down." She fell right onto Zabrina, who was laughing like the Joker, and they fell onto the floor laughing.

"Dude, seriously, did you?" Dick asked. Boy, these kids were annoying. He got up, towering over Dick, and grabbed him by the collar. "Yo! What are you doing? You're not Chuck Norris, let go of me!"

"Hey Connor, is it true Superman has a pair of Chuck Norris pajama- what the heck do you think you're doing? Put Dick down now!" Zabrina yelled.

"You'll have to catch him," Connor stated then he threw Dick, the thirteen year-old went crashing through the window and landed on a nearby flat bed truck, right on a king sized bed.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!DICK!"

Zabrina screamed. She jumped out after him but then...

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><p><strong>Dun, dun ,dun! I used a few Chuck Norris jokes, I got in this awesome book called THE TRUTH ABOUT CHUCK NORRIS. it is epic.<strong>


	5. Author's Notes yuck

**I know, just a stupid author's notes. But I just wanted to thank everyone for reading and reviewing, and I really want to thank with all my heart: . She made an AMAZING picture on my first chapter. Everyone should check it out.**

**And like I said, thanks for just reading my story, because compared to almost every other story on this site, I write really crappy stories! I'm still shocked that I got 7 reviews on this story. And on my other story (the only hope for me is you) I got 2 reviews! *screams in excitement* I'm also trying to get over the fact that people actually read my stories.**

**So, once again, thank you.**

**_Talkative Monkey_ (8D (THAT THING was my monkey Ringo)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey everyone, I'm _super _sorry about not updating this story in a long time. I've been really busy and I'm writing another story. On with the story...**

When Zabrina and Dick made it back to the apartment, Dick lurched at Connor. He flew punches here and there... but not one landed. After all, you can't destroy the man made of steel without kryptonite. Let alone his clone.

"SCREW YOU! I swear to _**GOD**_, you're gonna pay for that." Dick said. He quickly flipped out a weird looking doll thing and laughed sinister like.

"Is that a flipping voodoo doll Dick?" Artemis asked. "It looks a lot like Connor." She eyed him suspiciously. Artemis didn't understand that one little play date could turn into her having to babysit a bunch of preschoolers. Well... Zabrina wasn't all that bad- _when she wanted to be. _

""HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" Dick screamed maniacally. "FEEL MY WRATH CON-MONSTER!" Dick started to rapidly punch the voodoo. His eyes had that scary glint of malice in them.

Surprisingly, the punches actually hurt Connor. When the punching fit was over, Connor was on the ground twitching, his eyes wide with fear.

"What the _**HECK **_just happened?" Zabrina asked. "What a strange day. First, Connor flirts with Wally, then Dick gets thrown out of a window, then we just found out that Dick has a barbie doll version of Connor. REALLY strange day." She says as she scratches her head.

"I DID NOT FLIRT WITH WALLY! RAWR!" Connor yelled. He picked up Zabrina and threw _her _out the window. That created an almost inaudible gasp from Artemis and a momentarily unfazed Dick until he realized what just happened.

Dick got up and jumped out the window with a heavy sigh. A few loud curses escaped Artemis before she said, "DUDE! I DON'T NEED ANOTHER FREAKIN' HOLE IN MY WALL! OKAY?" She said as she loudly got up and inspected the two holes in her wall.

**Had to make this chapter short and sweet. I got somewhere to be... but I felt really bad so... I hope that I'll get the chance to update next friday. (8D**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys, once again super sorry for not updating. I've been really busy with school and my birthday was on the 2nd so I was and still am super busy.**

**Talkative Monkey**

"Okay guys, how 'bout we all kick Connor in the place no dude wants to get kicked-" Zabrina started.

"Wait, what? What's the place called that no dude wants to get kicked?" Connor interrupted. He honestly had no clue what they were talking about.

"Dude, really? Are you a girl?" Wally said. No one even knew he was awake. He hissed when he sat back down on his butt. "Yo, babe, why does my butt hurt?" He winked at Zabrina. "Was it you? Cause I don't mind if it was."

"Actually _weetard, _(**just had to put that in there, my friends and I say that to each other all the time**) it was Connor." Zabrina then mocked him by winking at him and giving him two thumbs up. "He _totally_ wants you, tiger."

Wally instantly paled, cause he knew Zabrina was telling the truth. Zabrina looked over to Connor and said, "If you throw me out the window, I will get Batman to give you the Bat glare for a full hour. Trust me, he won't mind. He kinda enjoys it actually." She gave him a cocky smile as Connor backed away from her.

"Oh yeah, how will you get to him?" Connor questioned. He had his hands on his hips with a smug smirk on his face.

"I have my connections, I know him out of the costume too." She gave a flirty glance at Dick who blushed. She then looked up at Connor. " You do know what that means right?"

"Um, no." He shook his head vigorously.

"It means I know who he is as a real person." Zabrina said. Connor still looked baffled. "You still don't understand, do you?"

"Yeah, no."

**Sorry for the really crappy ending, I just keep getting writers block. So I'd really appreciate it if you guys helped me out with some future chappies!**

**Talkative Monkey**


	8. Chapter 8

**Oh my god guys, I'm soooooooooooo sorry for not updating in so long. I don't even think I have a reasonable explanation for this, but I'm going to take a swing: I've been watching a lot of YJ. Still doesn't make up for it. Sorry...**

Zabrina had been pacing around the room for a few minutes. She had pressed her fingers up against her temples trying to relieve the painful headache. "Ya know, I've never been the one to have headaches but, I think I've aged about 40 years talking to you Connor." She shot a look at him from across the room.

"I kind of feel bad for Wally," Artemis said. "It's been a half hour and he's still in there crying. Can't you guys hear him?" Wally had went off to the bathroom to see how bad the damage was, it must've been pretty bad, because Wally was crying about how he was 'damaged goods' and how it was 'scarring him for life'. Of course Connor had no idea what any of this meant. But he could put two and two together.

"Lemme check," Arty said as she started to stand up. "Wally?" she softly knocked on the door. "Are you okay? Do you need any help?" She bit her lip as she heard the muffled sobs escalate a little bit.

"NO ONE WILL EVER LOVE ME NOW! What girl would want to see this ugly butt?" He cried out.

"Wally, lemme in," Artemis said. The door was yanked open and shut just as quickly. "AHHHHHHHHHH, OMG! LOOK AT THAT! IT"S PURPLE AND BLUE! EWWWWWWWWWWW!" Artemis screamed. She threw herself outside the door and was breathing heavily.

"Is it really that bad? I wanna see!" Zabrina tried to push her way around Artemis but failed. She landed on her butt with a pout. "I wanna see it Arty!" She slammed her fists against the floor like an angry toddler.

"Ugh," Arty sighed. "Wait! I have an idea! Zabrina," She turned to Zabrina and put her hand on her waist and used the other to point an accusing finger at Zabrina. "If you do not stop this immature act then you shall be banished to time out!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Not the time out chair!" Zabrina screamed. She got up and started to run around in circles. For some reason, she started to flail her arms around rapidly. As a result, she hit Connor straight in the face. She stopped and said, "Get outta the freakin' way wouldya?" she then shoved him out of the way and continued the strange act she was doing.


	9. Chapter 9

**I feel horrible for not updating in such a long time. I am embracing the fact that I don't have to got to school so... I just saw The Dark Knight Rises! I cried at two parts... and I am writing a story about it. Sooo... I also saw The Amazing Spiderman. Great movie also. I didn't cry during that. He... he. FAIL**

**Enjoi**

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><p>Dick had been rubbing his temples trying desperately to soothe the overwhelming headache that was pounding vigorously in his skull. He honestly didn't understand how such an innocent dare went so wrong on so many levels. Wally came out of the bathroom about 5 minutes ago- <em>thank GOD!<em>- but kept eyeing Superboy and had his hands protectively on his red butt cheeks. Artemis was trying to get Wally out of his comatose state, with no avail so far. Superboy kept clenching and unclenching his right hand. His left hand had the Superboy voodoo doll in a death grip that probably would even scare _Batman_.

Don't even start on Zabrina. She was eyeing Superboy and writing down something in a book. Dick walked over to her. "What are you writing down?"

She shoved the book into his face and said. "Observing the rare Superboy, first time I've ever seen such a... _hormonal species _before; I mean, he's even more hormonal than me for crying out loud! And I am pretty hard to beat. Right Dick? I used to claim this title till that darn Superboy was created! It was mine, ALL MINE! And you know what? I want that title back," Know Dick was scared. Sure, Zabrina was pretty hormonal, and Superboy was quite hormonal, but he thought Superboy was more angry than hormonal.

The page Zabrina had filled up said:

_THIS IS ZABRINA EVELINA CRINT REPORTING TO YOU POOR CITIZENS OF GOTHAM. I HAVE JUST SPOTTED A SUPERBOY... AND HE SEEMS TO BE VERY AGGRESSIVE. I WILL TRY NOT TO LET MY CURIOSITY GET THE BEST OF ME. EARLIER I SAW THE ASTONISHING SUPERBOY TRY TO KILL A WALLACE WEST; HE INJURED THE WALLACE WEST BUT DID NOT CATCH HIM. HE IS NOW STALKING HIS PREY, KNOWING THAT IT IS INJURED, VULNERABLE, AND SCARED. I MYSELF IS SCARED FOR THE WALLACE WEST. I WOULD BE QUITE SCARED TOO IF I KNEW A SUPERBOY WAS HOT ON MY TRAIL._

_THE SUPERBOY MIGHT HAVE A HARDER TIME CATCHING THE WALLACE WEST, FOR A SPECIES NAMED ARTEMIS CROCK IS NURTURING HIS INJURIES. BUT IF HE DOESN'T HAVE A HARD TIME, HE COULD KILL TWO INNOCENT ANIMALS AND HAVE A BIG FEAST TONIGHT WITH OTHER SUPERBOYS. I HOPE THAT THERE ARE NO MORE SUPERBOYS OUT THERE. _

_THIS IS ZABRINA EVELINA CRINT, RISKING HER LIFE FOR YOU INNOCENT FOOLS OUT THERE WHO RELY ON YOUR TV TO TELL YOU EVERYTHING ABOUT THE WORLD AND ARE EITHER OBESS OR ON THE EDGE OF OBESITY, SIGNING OFF._

"Um... I don't think there are anymore Superboys out there. And, you sounded pretty mean, calling people fools and everything," Dick trailed off. "What do you have against fat people anyway?"

Zabrina looked at him. "I don't have anything against fat people. I thought that was what TV reporters were supposed to do..." Zabrina said as a confused look in her eyes replaced the pride.

"Do what?"

"Insult people!" She narrowed her eyes as if asking _what do you know about the news that I don't? _She snatched back the journal and put it in her oversized jacket pocket. "I mean, that is what they do... right?" She said looking up at him and meeting his blue eyes.

"No, sometimes they don't even say signing off," Dick started. "Where did you even hear the term 'signing off'?"

"Apollo 13," She said. "Houston, we have a problem! Hehe... he... yeah." Zabrina awkwardly laughed. what about you Dick? Have you watched it?"

"Um... Bruce thinks I'll get um... ohidghwtf," Dick mumbled so quietly at the end not even Superboy could understand what he said.

"What? Speak clearly Dick!"

"BRUCE THINKS I'LL GET SCARED IF I WATCH APOLLO 13 BECAUSE I WATCHED IT WHEN I WAS TEN AND POOPED MYSELF AND COULDN'T SLEEP FOR 4 NIGHTS IN A ROW!" Dick said as his cheeks slowly began to turn red. Everyone in the room turned to look at Dick. Even Wally.

Superboy dropped the voodoo doll he was holding, both Artemis and Zabrina's mouth went slack, and Dick was too embarrassed to see his best friend's reaction.

"I watched Apollo 13 when I was like, 6. And by that age, I hadn't pooped anywhere but a toilet for like 2 years." Zabrina said. She softly put a hand on his shoulder and spoke softly to him. Her mannerisms reminded Dick of the way people would talk to you as if you watched both your parents fall to their death and you were an orphan. Phf, Dick _never _experienced that. "I'm so sorry buddy."

Dick hung his head in shame and said "S'not your fault..."

Just then Wally came out of his comatose state and started laughing and rolling on the floor. It was contagious. Soon everyone was rolling on the floor laughing besides Dick.

"Hey guys, don't you think this got a little out of hand? I mean... it's more sad and pathetic than funny." He wasn't surprised to see that no one heard him, but it still made him upset.

The door slammed open, and Ms. Crock rolled in. She narrowed her eyes dangerously. "Oprah is giving out gifts to her audience for Christmas. Not only am I upset that I'm not there... I'm upset that I can't hear a word she is saying! If you kids don't shut your faces, there will be consequences, _trust me!_"

"You think we laugh too much? Well you should hear the Joker. He's relentless!" Zabrina said. It seemed as though she had turned her common sense off.

"What did you just say to me child?"Ms. Crock said dangerously waving her pocket knife around, she had unsheathed her blade and was waving it around intimidatingly.

That got Zabrina's attention. "Um... nothing ma'am. Nothing at all, I was just telling Wally to stop saying how hot you are. I was telling him how disrespectful that is... right Wally?" Zabrina looked at Wally menacingly.

"Oh,no" Wally said as Ms. Crock dragged him by the ear, out the door.

"You just practically gave Wally a death sentence. He may not want to be friends with you anymore after this."

The 4 sidekicks gulp was audible at the same time.

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><p><strong>Poor Wally, he just can never get his way huh? I love reviews, I write better chapters when I get some nice reviews!<strong>

**TM**


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